Getting to Know Him
We have the first of our forms back from DtD and I'm giddy. This leads to moments like, awww, he has BLUE eyes. Oh, he's 5'9". Hmmm, I didn't know he smoked for five years. Bad, bad boy. What about the shit-load of heart disease he's adding to my near-perfect family health history. Yes, we're overweight but we have little cancer, little heart disease, little diabetes, little anything. We live forever (great grandma died at 108, grandma is pushing 92, not daisies).
Is it right to look at Project Baby as a genetic engineering experiment? The opportunity to thin out the flaws our our families?
We're all going to die of something. It used to be infectious disease until antibiotics were brought on the scene. Now we're privileged enough to get fat off our wealth and die because of it. If it's not heart disease, it'll be stroke. If it's not stroke, cancer. Not cancer, you'll lose your mind. And in the end you'll aspirate and die of pneumonia because your muscles won't let you swallow anymore. There is no way to exit this life gracefully. If anything, that's what working in the hospital has taught me.
If I could have M.s genetic baby it would come with her cute nose, her blue eyes, her German heritage, her mother's early heart attack and her grandfather's alcoholism. Is this much different than what our donor brings to our genetic soup? Not really. Would I care? No. What I see is that he brings his goodness, his caring and he's someone who I can see being a significant part of our child's life. Is this more important than the right genetic combination for eternal health?
I think so.
posted by Sacha @ 10:23 PM
1 comments
1 Comments:
Here, here! This is something I've been in a bit of a quandry about as well. There is history of cancer in my family, and our PKD also has some history of cancer. At first I was panicked, thinking "OMG, we're condeming our unborn child to a life of potential pain & ill-health!" But then I began to think of those who are able to conceive children with their partners and wonder if they think a whole lot about this, and in as much depth. For example, my brother and his wife planning on having kids - both have parents who have had cancer (both of my SIL's parents have had various forms). Is this irresponsible? Or is it putting great faith in medical technology and healthier lifestyles?
I'm with you - you can't ever be 100% certain that someone's family medical history will come to play out - negatively - in your child. Better to know that this child will be conceived out of love & friendship.
Sorry for any incoherency; it's morning & the beginning of a busy day at work!
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