Sleep!
Sleep is an amazingly contentious issue with a lot of judgement around it. Not only in the discussion below, but in general. In the support group that M. and I attend, it's one of the most often discussed subjects.
There are a few things to point out.
First, everyone has different sleep needs. Trust me, I can function on about six hours of sleep in general. M. needs nine or ten. Guess who gets more sleep even now?
Second, there are some babies who are up every two hours. There are some who sleep twelve then have a three hour nap during the day. There are some babies who can resettle (self soothe) and there are some who need a gentle hand to help guide them into their slumber. Clearly sleep has to do with temperament to some degree.
There are a lot of different ideas about sleep out there and everyone will find different things that work for them. I honestly think we should celebrate with the parents who have good sleepers and support those who are struggling in this area with no judgement.
Where do M. and I stand on sleep? Finn will routinely sleep five hours before a feeding every night. Our biggest issue is that sometimes those five hours start at 8 pm and we're not ready for bed. In all honesty, we're okay with things. I mean, I'm tired like I've never been before and some days barely functioning, but we're surviving. It would be nice if he'd give us more sleep but I am so focused on him right now that it's not feeling like a burden to drag my tired ass out of bed and feed my beautiful boy. We have a sleep book. I read the introduction and probably won't read more any time soon. We've decided to not worry about his sleep and to go with our instincts.
I have this amazing trust in Finn and that he will do what he needs to do. And he does, but sometimes it takes our tears and his before things even out.
posted by Sacha @ 6:33 AM
5 comments
5 Comments:
If what you have going is working for your family, there's no reason to do anything differently. From this chair, it looks like Finn is a beautiful and thriving baby who is well loved by his parents.
Goodness knows that not all babies and parents are alike, and different families make different choices. We have chosen to keep 16-month-old Sanna in our bed, and we're very content with this decision. If that needs to change at some point, we'll change it. For now, this works well for us.
FWIW - Hannah sleeps quite well. Yesterday she began putting herself to sleep for naps. We've always put her down sleepy. She napped for 2.5 hours for her afternoon nap and was asleep on time for bedtime.
Most nights are without a fuss. Teething and colds rock that. But even having been on the road for>2 weeks she knows her routine.
Oh, and we've not done CIO. Wimpers and whining she stays... crying or screaming we go!
You are doing a great job! He is beautiful.
Could you tell us about your decision to use cloth diapers and how you feel about it now? The cloth diaper websites offer different products and I do not have the experience to decide among the products, and I will have some convincing to do.
Well said. If there is one lesson I have learned as a parent, it is that we know what's best for our children. I shall not judge what someone else does for their baby, when they are trusting their instincts.
Some days I want more sleep. Like today because I've been up way too late too many nights in a row. It's hard sometimes not being able to sleep in or nap when you want. I like being up at night and can't get to bed when Riley does. It just doesn't happen.
We also have different sleep needs. I can go on very little sleep (have done that quite often since I like being up until midnight and then I'm up at 5:45 am every morning). Angele needs a lot more sleep and generally gets it. She has to work so she gets the sleep she needs and she can't function well on little sleep.
Riley started off with maybe 3-4 hours at a time during the night. Then 4-5 then 5-6 and now she sometimes does a full night (around 10 hours). That is beautiful when that happens. :)
anonymous, cloth diapers rock! They are cheap, easy to use and care for and are environmentally friendly. We love them and would do it all over again if we had to choose. Besides, we can use them for child #2 so it's great--we're all set! :) Our favourites are Bummis Whisper Wraps for the liners and prefolds, Motherease One Size and Sandy's.
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