Q&A Redux Part VII

From Anne...

When your baby arrives, will one of you stay home for a period of time? If so, who? And how long do you get off or will you have to take a leave or quit?

I grew up with a mom who not only worked but one who was the primary bread winner for our family. I never realized how much this affected my world view until I went to college and heard people, one after another, tell what their dad did for a living then refer to their mother as "his wife". I am SO PROUD of my mother and she is a huge part of my strength in life. For this reason, I think it's important for our child to have working mothers.

But I realize that it's also optimal for our baby's development to be out of day care for at least a year. Luckily M. works part time and as an RN my schedule is very flexible. With some juggling, and never seeing each other, we can keep the baby out of day care for that year. One of the reasons we've waited until now to TTC is prior to this we would have had to do day care because we need both our incomes.

We have crap for maternity leave in the states. Some countries mandate a certain amount of time off. Not here. You could give birth and head back to work a week later and no one would blink an eye. Our plan is for me to take three months of maternity (using my vacation, holiday and sick leave) then for M. to take 2-3 months of maternity. After that we'll fix our schedules so when I work, M. is home and when M. works, I'm home. At a year we'll put the kid in part-time day care so we can see each other.

Will M try to breastfeed when you give birth and vice-versa?

We went through this discussion and considering M.'s funky hormones, we've decided trying to stimulate her lactation wouldn't be a good idea. Especially since #2 will probably be worked on ASAP. BUT...if M. gets pregnant quickly I would probably still be breastfeeding and we'd both breastfeed both children. Why should only one person be the milk cow?