One Year Later...

Finn is one.

I can't believe it. I swear this year was warp speed. I can't believe we have a toddler. I can't believe I've been back at work for eight months. I can't believe we survived.

Finn is such a great kid. He's sweet and very generous. He loves people and I don't worry for a moment about socializing him. He's happy. He has a fantastic sense of humor. I love to hang out with him.

He's still an intense and challenging child. He needs so much of us and we work hard to give it. I'm glad that he doesn't need as much as he did when he was born because he is exhausting. Sometimes I worry that he needs so much that a sibling will be a disaster for our sweet little boy. We now see the world through his lens, filtering everything we do through how it may affect our fantastic little boy.

M. and I have found our new normal. Our new life as parents has a million and one limitations but we have stopped mourning what we used to have and adjusted to our new reality. We've found new ways to function and cope. And for all the limitations, our new life has one important thing that our old one didn't - our son.

I will never love another child like I love Finn. He is our first and I am so glad it was HIM who was born 365 days ago, him who came screaming out of my abdomen, him who pushed both M. and myself to our very limits in our efforts to get him out in the way we wanted. I am so glad he's here.

And now our first born son is running around the house with his bits dangling and his bum cold. He's tired and night is coming. Maybe tonight I'll get a couple hours of not being a parent and maybe not. No matter what, it's been a good day and I'm excited about what's to come in our next year.