Thoughts of Unmedicated Birth
I've been doing a lot of thinking about what's ahead. Labor is becoming less conceptual and more impending. Part of my processing has been thinking about the decision M. and I have made to work toward an unmedicated birth.
My desire for an unmedicated birth was primarily formed in nursing school where I saw first-hand the cascade of interventions: epidural, vasodilation, oxygen, mom in distress, baby in distress, vacuum extraction, c-section.
Lately I've come to understand that my desire for an unmedicated birth has become about feelings.
M. and I have worked so hard for this baby, and we have fought through this pregnancy to get the care that we need. We've embraced the joys and pain of TTC and pregnancy and I don't want to go through that just to not feel.
Then there's him. The boy. He can't decide to get narcotics or an epidural. He can't say 'stop' when my uterus squeezes him. I just can't imagine making a decision to make my life easier when he's going through so much. I want to be connected to him, to feel him, for him to never be isolated and alone. I want that from the beginning.
I know there are reasons for pain relief. Good reasons. Reasonable reasons. I know an epidural may be a decision M. and I make at some point. I know I'm scared about labor, and that's okay. If I can't embrace my fears, I can't get through what lies ahead.
posted by Sacha @ 7:02 PM
7 comments
7 Comments:
I keep trying to send you the hypnobirthing MP3's but am having a lot of trouble. I hope it works - if it doesn't I'll find another way to send them.
I like reading your thoughts, and not just because they are similar to mine! :) Seriously, though, I know you will do what you think is best for all involved and that is all we CAN do, actually.
I am looking forward to your labor/birth story so I know what I have to look forward to!
I really enjoyed being able to feel every moment of pushing and giving birth. I felt really connected to the whole thing and I was able to try various positions and move around.
For me it was really the contractions that were the most painful part, but you just take them one at a time and you get through it.
Also the endorphins that kick in during transition are intense and feel amazing.
You can do it!!!
It is the most beautiful, pleasurable pain you will ever know.
I agree that it's important to acknowledge and deal with the fear. I was afraid I would be in so much pain I would die. I was afraid that I would become too exhausted to continue. I did get to a point during labor when I thought I might die. I also got so exhausted that the midwife was feeding me tablespoons of honey and the only reason I was able to swallow was because I had already dealt with my fear. I was determined. I delivered a 10lb 14oz baby. Take heart; most babies can be delivered without intervention. I had also worked through my fear of intervention, so I was prepared to focus on safe passage for my son in the event that I needed help to deliver my son. Good Luck to you both.
You girls are just amazing. I rush to my computer EVERY DAY to see if you have posted a new blog. I have watched you as a couple since you were still ttc. I was so excited to find out that you were preggo, and I have so much loved reading about all the things you two have been through, and all the delicious little trips you girls have taken during your pregnancy, not to mention the hillarious pictures like the one of you standing outside, with wet hair, a pregnant belly, and snow in the background... I really really hope that you are able to have the birth experience that you long for. You gals have been an inspiration to me in MY quest to get pregnant with my partner. You have quite a fan club gals! Keep the blogs coming and good luck!!
For me it was important to aim for an unmedicated birth, but to give myself permission to use pain relief if I had to. In the end I was able to give birth without medication. Pushing was the most euphoric experience of my life, I can honestly say I loved it. The 30 hours of contractions (mostly at home) that came before that, not so much.
My sister-in-law was not so lucky. With both of her children she took courses on natural birth and hypnobirthing. With baby #1 a long and difficult labour meant she eventually chose an epidural. With #2 an emergency c-section took things out of her hands.
It bothered me to see how upset she was with the births, and this is partly why I gave myself permission to take meds if needed. I kept telling myself that a birth plan was just that, a plan, and if things didn't go exactly the way I wanted it was no big deal. This helped me to relax and work through the pain.
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