One heckuva BAD day...
Parenting has been an uphill climb, but it always feels like it's getting better. Then you have these days where everything falls apart. Yesterday was that kind of day X 100.
We're crazy busy right now. I'm back to work. M. is starting to get post partum doula clients. She's also working this little contract job she's done for the last three years. There's no time for anything. Like cleaning the house. Like filling my prescription for Zoloft. By yesterday I hadn't taken the Zoloft for two days.
M. was working. I was home with Finn. I was so tired that I could barely think. Finn has been consolidating his naps but while he's napping less often, they aren't getting longer in duration. It was bad enough having a baby that took six half hour naps per day. Now we have a baby that takes three half hour naps a day. By five o'clock yesterday he'd taken one 30 minute nap and one 20 minute nap. I felt like I was going insane.
It was bad. I started wanting to scream at Finn because I was so tired and needed a break. I was calling M. in tears. Then I found out that the pharmacy where I get my Zoloft was going to close in an hour. M. was way out in the 'burbs. I called her, freaking out, trying to get her to come back early so she could pick up my prescription and she kept trying to tell me something...
The car was dead.
Shit.
I had forty minutes to take the bus to the pharmacy. I was unshowered, hair unbrushed, teeth unbrushed and don't think I smelled terribly good. Somehow I grabbed Finn, got out the door with the diaper bag and the sling, and RAN to get the bus. Then I called our best friend, KK, and she was home and able to pick up M. I called DtD, who is out of town, he answered and said we could use his car. He got ahold of BF, who was home, and told him M. was on her way to pick it up. AND I made it to the pharmacy with only five minutes to spare.
Three hours later we finally made it home. Finn's carseat is strapped in the back of DtD's car. Our car is stuck in suburban HELL and will not start.
And I have my Zoloft back on board. I was feeling so crazy yesterday and unusually tired, and I'm pretty sure it was me withdrawing off Zoloft. I swear that two hours after I took it, the exhaustion was gone and I could think again. Fucking, fucking INSANE what drugs can do to you.
And I LOVE MY FAMILY OF CHOICE. What would we do without KK, DtD and BF? I hope they feel all thet love that is radiating toward them.
posted by Sacha @ 7:19 AM
5 comments
5 Comments:
It's really awesome that the people around you were able to help you out so much. Also, kudos for keeping your cool and organizing things so you and M. could have car to get around in. I hope the problem with your car isn't anything big, it's probably just the battery.
Sorry your day was so rough yesterday... :( I'm sure one day within the next year, I'll have the same rant. I did think if this, however......I know you guys are very "together" when it comes to parenting, and you have done a lot of research in the way of parenting styles, etc. So, this is NOT a suggestion of parenting, rather an recommendation of something I used once for a family I worked with. Have you read Baby Wise? It's one of those "get your baby to sleep better" books. I'm not big on CIO, so this is not one of those. I can say that it worked like a charm.....doesn't work for everyone, but thought I'd at least intro it to you if you haven't heard of it already. :)
Again, NOT a suggestion...just a book I enjoyed and have seen work WELL.
Sorry your day sucked. :-( Glad you have a rockin' family of choice though!!!
glad you have support! life can be crazy sometimes! hang in there!!! {{{hugs}}}
Delurking to say... I'm sure you were going through Zoloft withdrawl. While I haven't taken Zoloft, I've been on another SSRI and been trying to get off of it and the withdrawl symptoms are extremely powerful even as I taper very slowly. I hope now that you're taking the Zoloft again- you'll continue to feel better!
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