11 Months

Snuggles, originally uploaded by Sacha Digi.

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about where we were last year at this time compared to where we are now, and the chasm the size of the Grand Canyon that the last year feels like.

Wow.

Last year I was in pain, crying myself to sleep because my sciatica was so bad. We were scared because M. lost her job and I couldn't work anymore. We were busy with NSTs and doc appointments and ultrasounds. We were working hard to keep our boy tucked inside my abdomen as long as possible.

Now we're parents. It's hard to understand the gravity of that statement unless you have been dragged through the hell fires that adding a child to your life feels like.

Parents.

The weeks go by so fast. I know it won't be long before March 31st arrives, the day I waddle from the bedroom with fluid dripping down my legs, heavy with child as well as the knowledge that Finn was at that point inevitable.

Again, wow.

How is the boy? He is so, so good.

I have to admit that at the moment life with Finn feels a little like pure bliss. I know this could end tomorrow so M. and I are enjoying it while we can. He spends his days crawling around the house and slowly deconstructing it bit by bit. He's exploring his world and actively destroying ours all at once. He laughs at everything, everyone and sometimes nothing at all. He loves his moms and it shows. He is our joy (and pain, sunshine and rain, pump it pump it up - taking a break for an old skool moment).

One month until one, and spring, and flowers, and leaves on the trees, and newness everywhere. And cake. You can never forget birthday cake.