I'm tired...
I apologize to anyone who reads this blog for the lack of posts. In all honesty, I'm tired. Babycakes has been an amazing experience for me and an outlet to work through TTC, being a new parent and now having a toddler. I've loved writing this and I love even more that even one person finds what I have to say useful and worthwhile.
I'm still tired. I work, I parent, I work more and somewhere in there I'm not sure about who I've become. I've had to pull back from several different places in order to refocus my energy and have had serious questions about where I belong. My entire life I've been an outsider, then every once in a while I manage to make it to the inner circle and it usually reminds me why I'm out there alone in the first place.
I've never wanted babycakes to be just a TTC blog or just a pregnacy blog or just a parenting blog. Droning on about how cute Finn is or bragging about his latest accomplishment is maybe something his grandparents might enjoy, but the rest of the world doesn't really care (just so everyone knows, he is the cutest, smartest most wonderful little boy and there isn't a millisecond of any day that I'm not grateful that he's our baby).
This leaves me with wondering what babycakes really is, or has become. I guess I'm wondering what YOU want it to be, because it's not defined by me, it's defined by being something useful and worthwhile to the people who actually read it.
So tell me. Do you want it to go on as is? Do you want more of my pain in the ass rantings about what I think should and shouldn't be in this world? Do you want more of life with Finn? I need some energy to keep writing because, as I said, I'm pretty low-energy these days.
All my love! S.
p.s. in the meantime, I do have something to say about our postponed TTC #2, which I'll put into another post.
posted by Sacha @ 7:59 PM
22 comments
22 Comments:
I understand the tired. But I'd love to keep hearing about the day to day ups and downs. The(lack of) sleep, the food fests, the joy and of course, the brain melt. Whatever. This parenting ride is endlessly fascinating...
i enjoy reading your blog :) i am a second year nursing student, so you know where my mind-state is...and i dont comment much (at all? is this my first comment?) but i do check in on ya'll and i am a sucker for Finn stories and pics ;)
much love!
gypsygrrl
http://kissesandcompliments.com
You are wrong -
Your readers do not define your blog -
I enjoy ALL of your posts and would hate to see a formulaic approach -
You write what you feel -
That is real -
Keep up the good work -
You are doing a GREAT job!
Shannon
I read your blog, In fact I have to check it daily for updates. This is actually my first post as well. I love watching finn grow up and your experiences help me out with my 13 month old. I also give you the credit for me nursing him and still nursing him, You gave me the courage and understanding that it was ok to nurse in public...so for that thanks!!!
Wendy
I've always enjoyed your honesty about your life. I think it's always interesting to see what others think or what they go through. Personally, I have enjoyed it as is and would hope that you would continue in some form...
I love the rants, though I don't always agree with you. I love hearing how you and M navigate the tricky parts. We're TTC for number two using a different uterus (me this time), and I like reading about families that are also planning a switcheroo, so for that selfish reason, I really hope you don't bail (though I totally get the tired thing. Truly.)
(Also, I'm not a random new commenter, I used to comment here and other places as dlvc, but took an easier name now that we've jumped into the blogging fray ourselves)
I say: all of the above. That's how i use my own blog; at times i feel like it's devolved into a braggy parent blog, but I like the outlet and the interaction, so I keep it up. Honestly, I'd be especially curious about the "Who you are in this world" since I identify entirely with your statement about being an outside, even when you're an insider.
Agree with all of the above; if you're looking for a bit of an emotional writing kickstart, I wonder what passion or interest has been squashed by The Tired for you? I don't think every entry has to be brilliant, and I also don't think you need to write to what you think we want. Write what's in your heart. Write the uncertainty, and the lost feelings. To paraphrase a famous quote, write as though nobody is listening. We are, but don't let us limit you.
I regularly debate whether or not I should start a blog, what I would have to add that isn't already richly supplied by reading others like you, and whether I've got the time to do it justice. In the meantime, though, you and others on the LesbianFamily site keep me in touch with what lesbian parenting does and can mean. Good on you. But be easy. We'll wait till you've got some energy again.
i love hearing about the ups and downs of life with a toddler. I have a daughter around Finn's age and its nice to read about someone going through a similar phase in life. I also like your recs on cleaning supplies, baby music, and other cool things youve found. Thanks for writing.
i also have enjoyed your reading your blog and hearing your experience of parenting and adventures with finn. i also admire you for "putting out there" what your beliefs and values are as a parent, partner, and individual. keep it up, in whatever form it takes!
sarah from rc
Please don't disappear completely. I've got a handful of blogs I read that involve kids a bit older than mine (she's 12 months) that I read for a "what's to come" type flavor. I also think you should write about whatever you want, but since you asked for input - would like more adventures in toddler nursing (have you ever had issues with biting, and HOW.DO.I.MAKE.IT.STOP), sleep stuff is always interesting to me (sad, I know), the identity issues you raise here are definitely way interesting to me, and I always like it when you talk about food. (:
Oh, and I meant to say - of my "what's to come" blogs, yours is one of my faves!
Well, I've absolutely enjoyed watching your family unfold, but completely get it if feels like posting takes from the time you might have to give to yourself, your family, and your friends (which is why I don't blog myself). Then again if posting helps to process some of what is going on with any of the above, maybe it's worth spending the time to do it. I'll always be happy to ride along and will try to comment more. Do it however feels best- I love it just the way it is. Your boy is such a cutie, by the way, and I'm dying to hear an update about his next sibling!
I love reading your blog. Your post are fine and I say keep it the way it is :)
I love your blog. I find your sense of humor to be very refreshing. It's nice to know that someone who has a toddler the same age is going through the same things. Plus some of the things you say on here just make me giggle.
I, too, enjoy your blog. Sometimes it annoys me, sometimes it makes me laugh, sometimes I hear exactly what you're saying and what you mean... other times I totally don't get where you're coming from...
I do hope that you keep it up, you help me to think about other perspectives than my own, which is always good!!
Your blog should no more be about just one thing than you are. If you feel like writing, do so. About anything on your mind. If you don't feel like it, don't. Folks will still be here when you feel like sharing again.
My partner and I don't have a lot of access to other same-sex parents. Your blog is a light in the dark and a kindred spirit regardless of *what* you write about. We are also two women raising a young son who we brought into this world with a known donor. It's hard to find other similar parents close by!! :-) Personally, I enjoy reading about daily parenting with Finn the best. Also, Finn is about 6 months older than our son and I love reading about 'what's next' development wise.
Another thought - I also struggle with having the energy to post. I've recently taken several weeks off simply because I didn't have the energy to put out there. My thoughts? Don't sweat it. People will either understand or they won't. It's all part of raising kids and balancing a life. I'll definately keep checking in even during 'low post' times.
Finn is 6 weeks older than my DS and I find it fascinating to see what he's up to. =D
Aw, thanks everyone. I avoided looking at comments because I was sure there were none. Okay, I'll keep writing even if it's not as often. The creative juices will flow again.
another dyke with a toddler, and expecting again in 2 months. like the queer and gender insights, parenting stuff. thanks!
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