Playing it Straight: The American Dream

We're heading into semen analysis territory, which means we have to play straight. Because if the analysis folk know that I'm not fucking DtD, they won't do it.

I'm working on our cover story:

We met in a bar, I was drunk, had sex in the back seat of his car (I'm a slut). Married two years later in Vegas (drunk again). I'm having an affair with his best friend. He has an online gay porn habit and hits on my friends' husbands when he's drunk at Christmas parties. I snort a little coke every once in a while to cover my pain. My biological clock is ticking and I want my baby, damn it.

The American Dream.

Actually, I'm going to call DtD and tell him that if anyone asks, we have a happy marriage, I'm the best thing that ever a happened to him and he adores the ground I walk on. Now go and jack off into that cup!