The Conundrum of Family

Family-wize, we've only told the parents about the pregnancy so far. We're waiting to tell siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, etc...until around nine or ten weeks. Just to give the little frog some more time to stick.

My brother will be thrilled. M.'s brothers will be excited. M.'s sister is going to FREAK OUT.

We had a long talk with M.'s mom yesterday. We talked about her sister and how she's completely controlled by her fears, especially around issues of homosexuality. She's afraid that one of her kids could be gay. She's afraid of us influencing them in that direction. She's controlled by her husband's uneasiness and possible borderline hatred of queers. I guess M.'s sister is sinking deeper into her homophobia.

We were proud of M.'s mom who challenged Miss Thang on her antiquated assumptions about queers.

Remember, Miss Thang is the person who told M. that her relationship is SUPERIOR to ours because it involves a penis.

M.'s sis is not only homophobic, she is heterosexist. She believes that there is something inherently superior about her because she is straight. She will not be happy that her little sis is having a baby with her lesbian lover (he he). She will not accept that we have as much of a right to be mothers and to have a family as she does. When she was trying to get pregnant, years and years ago, before she and her husband moved to IVF, she told my MIL that it would not be fair or right if we, the lesbians, were able to conceive and she and her husband, the chosen straight people, had to struggle. In her eyes, we are not good or deserving enough to parent.

She will not be happy that this baby was concieved with minimal interventions.

Part of me can't wait to tell M.'s sis about the baby. Part of me doesn't look forward to having to protect our child from his or her own family.