Mommy Warning System Version 6.1
Pregnancy is such a strange experience. All of the sudden your body and your responses to the world are completely different than they used to be.
Lately it seems that my Flight or Fight response is in overdrive. I sense DANGER all around me. The worst is in the car. Every time I get into the car I get this overwhelming feeling that there is something wrong with it. As we drive down the road I listen for any little strange knock, tick or jerk. The freeway is especially bad. I scan the horizon for breaklights and tell M. when I see them...RED LIGHTS! It's gotten to the point that I can't even drive because I spend the whole time gripping the steering wheel like my life depends on it. There is never enough space between us and the car in front of us, M. never slows down enough, and I spend entire car trips gasping and sucking my teeth.
WHAT THE FUCK?
The worst part? I've always been the mostly fearless one in the relationship and here I am paralyzed by fear even when the person I trust the most in the world to keep me and the little boy safe is at the wheel. It's horrible to feel that controlled by your hormones and by the need to protect this baby you haven't even met yet.
Yes, my Mommy Warning System is in full gear. I can't even imagine how bad it will be when The Unnamed One arrives and we have to deal with the millions of very real threats he faces.
posted by Sacha @ 9:36 AM
5 comments
5 Comments:
I totally get it. I almost was hit (for real) crossing the street the other day, by a car. Something like that always would have upset me/pissed me off, but I was crying all day because I kept thinking it could have killed me AND the baby!
yeah i get all upset still... actually it might be worse now... I am 100% overprotective of the girl
If anybody sneezes near me I nearly cover my face with my shirt whilst punching them. I have a sudden urge to wipe things down with alcohol. If anybody dodgy looking comes near me I wrap my arms around my belly. I'm psycho too!
I'm always terrified when I drive on the freeway in your fair city. :) It's healthy to feel protective, and I think some of the fear will go away with the hormones.
I totally get it! When I pg with DD (8 yrs ago) I was the same way. Worried about anyone that came close to me.. any car that looked odd.. anything that made the "mother Hulk" come out in me.. lol.. I realized when she was about 2 1/2 that I needed to step back and watch from a distance and let her be a child! You can over see their life but you can not protect them from everything. I feel for you! Been there done that! Letting your child have space and freedom past the reach of your hand is hard. Just know that for the next few months your little one is safer than anyone in this world. Being held nice, safe, warm and cozy under your heart! Then when he is introduced to the world it will be your and M's guidance that will make him a strong, productive child in this world!
Relax sweets and you two enjoy this ride. It is one of a lifetime! Peace to you both..
April (DestinySky,FF)
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