Hey Jealousy

Things with my mother are starting to actually improve in the tiniest increments.  She's still pushing constantly at whatever boundary I put up, but she's also managing to respect them now and them, which takes some of the pressure off me.

It's amazing how having a child can change your relationships.

What I am still coping with, though, is the rampant jealousy my mother has when it comes to Finn.  

Finner has a second cousin about four months younger than him.  Cousin Bob and his mom currently live with my aunt.  My mother is constantly comparing how much time my aunt gets to see Cousin Bob with how much time she gets to see Finn.  She is resentful that Cousin Bob travels internationally while M. and I won't even take Finn down to see my parents which is 1.5 hours away.  It makes me ever so slight INSANE.

Cousin Bob is not Finn and Finn is not Cousin Bob.  They are different babies.  They have different needs.  

M. and I have worked our asses off to protect our child and give him what he needs.  This has been at the sacrifice of ourselves as well as pretty much everyone around us.  It means no long trips, being home in time for Finn's bed time, leaving places when he's not coping well and pretty much not doing what we want in order to take care of our son.  

My mother doesn't see this.  All she sees is that we won't let her have her way.  

I understand that she wants to see her grandson.  I don't know why she treats us like we're withholding access instead of seeing that we're trying to be the best parents we possibly can be.  It's frustrating and tiring and makes me mad that she consistently places her needs above her grandson's.

But things ARE getting better and it gives me hope that maybe she'll be able to put all this crazy jealousy behind her at some point.

18 months

Our eighteen month appointment has come and gone.  No more going to the doc until 2 years.  We have changed our care from Dr. G. to Dr. Christina.  Dr. Christina is a naturopath who can treat us as a family and can prescribe, aka Have Your Zoloft and Herbal Tincture Too!

Anyhoo...

The stats.  Finn is 23 pounds, 33 inches tall and still has a giant head.  He's 15th percentile weight, 75th height and 90th head.  And right now he's currently covered in Kerry Edwards buttons from the last election.  Funny.  

He has maybe around 10 words (he's a BOY, okay.  Too busy for chatting) but easily over 30 signs and uses them together...dog sleeping, cat water, baby pig, more water and so on. 

The visit was miserable.  Finn freaked out once Dr. Christina took out her stethoscope and was inconsolable from that moment until we had left the office.  It was almost impossible to get his weight because he was screaming, stiff as a board, shaking with his toes pointed.  My poor sweet lovable boy.

We then walked to Whole Foods and everything was somehow okay.       

sling comparison

sling comparison, originally uploaded by Sacha Digi.

Finn at four months in M.'s pocket sling, then again at eighteen months. How he has GROWN! He's not carried as much these days but still loves to snuggle close in a sling now and then. So sweet.